The right to complain

15w 6d

I occasionally make comments on facebook about some of the pregnancy symptoms I have including aches and lack of sleep.  I want to share it with friends because facebook is the only medium I get to talk to a lot of them right now.  What I didn't count on was older friends and family making comments similar to "get used to it; you'll have 18 more years of it."

At first, they were funny and maybe a bit witty.  But I don't make these posts to get that kind of response out of people.  Perhaps I do look for pity in a few of my status updates, but I want my current concerns to be recognized for what they are.  Yes, I am aware some of these symptoms will not go away anytime soon, but does that mean I don't deserve validation for my current suffering?  It is all for a wonderous, joyful reason, and belittling it now because I'll have years of it negates that sense of my experiences now for the sake of the baby in my arms someday.  I would almost prefer comments to constantly say "hang in there; it's all for baby" than what I can only interpret as reprimands for daring to complain now.

I know that I'm going to be bombarded by these comments by well-meaning people who think they're being funny or realistic.  But why can't people trust that I already know these things?  I know I'm going to have backaches and lack of sleep for years to come, but it's not about the backache.  It's about the experience of being a parent and getting to watch someone be their own person from day 1.  Yes, I'm hormonal and sometimes need to vent; but when I'm venting, the last thing I want to hear is that I have years of it ahead of me.  I do my best to focus on the positives of life before me, but it doesn't mean I'm not entitled to letting off steam every now and then.  It makes me want to block my status messages from all but my friends who don't yet have kids fully raised.